So, Game of Thrones is gross and How I Met Your Mother is also gross! Two for you, TV. Really. Good job. How about we talk about something that isn't gross?

( So let's talk about Orphan Black. )

After pulling an all nighter last night, I am pretty exhausted, both physically and mentally.

( More miserable whining and complaining )

This is just some pointless rambling on the state of my life.

( Read more... )

GOD I AM SUCH A MISERABLE COMPLAINER, I'm sorry everyone who read this

WHEN DID FEBRUARY HAPPEN.

When did 2014 happen.

I've been sick for the past five weeks, on and off, and today I got an inhaler. I have affectionately named it Ron Swanson, because it kind of looks like a mustache.





Does this pass as a reasonable entry yet?

I want to read books more, and talk to people about books. I read the whole Hunger Games trilogy this summer and even though I was bursting with thoughts about it, those thoughts never went anywhere. Yes, not liking Mockingjay is probably universal, but was I the only one disappointed with most of Catching Fire as well? The movie was better than the book, in my opinion. I want to finish Discworld, see what Neil Gaiman and Robin McKinley and Janet Fitch and Elizabeth Kostova are up to, check out Jacqueline Carey's new series, get further than A Feast for Crows in ASoIaF, check out the Vorkosigan Saga since Sev referenced it, years and years ago, in a fic she wrote for me. I want to finally read Diana Wynne Jones and Jasper Fforde. I want to read the comics Yuul and Val keep recommending.

I want to go for walks. I want to start swimming again. I haven't been swimming in years and I miss it. I know I'm out of shape, partly due to endo limiting what I can do, but I keep being recommended exercise and I keep not taking the initiative. The gym at school is free now. I should take advantage of that. I want to be at least a little healthier.

I want to cook actual meals more, rather than defaulting to whatever is closest at hand.

I want to spend more time with my family, especially the cousins I rarely get to see. I have over twenty cousins, and a lot of them are in my age bracket, but because of distance and schedules, I don't get to see them very much. My closest cousin (in affection, not in distance) has a two year old daughter that I still haven't met. I want to do more things with the cousins who do live close, because they just lost their mother this past summer and need their family right now.

I want to do better in school. I do well for the most part, As and Bs, but I failed an assignment that was worth 20% of my grade in the course and got a 68 on a different assignment. I'm used to overachieving -- I had a 4.0 at my last school -- but I've become lazy, and I want to fix that. I want to have an academic record I can be proud of, especially if I am considering taking the LSATs.

I want to talk to people more one-on-one. I'm really happier doing that than the alternative. I want to make more time for my RL friends; [Friend] has been back in Canada for months now and I've still not seen her. I want to catch up with the people I went to Sheridan with. I want to make more friends at my current school.

I want to do more volunteer work. I got my sexual violence crisis counselor/public educator certification a week ago, so starting in January I need to do 25 hours of public education about consent and healthy relationships and then I start my actual counselor duties. I want to do more things like that. I want to be involved.

I want to update my iPod because it's been almost two years, what the hell.

I want to write actual fanfic again. I want to do my chocobo down requirements for FFEX and get back into the exchange itself. I've learned a great deal about writing in the past few years, and I want to apply what I've learned in a way that's separate from RP.

I want to use my DW more!

I want to survive this week. Two finals down, two to go and I am ridiculously stressed to the point of just wanting the world to fuck off -- basically, if you're not Kay or Yuul or Val or my mother, don't even talk to me, I will become the Jesociraptor and eat your face off no matter how much I like you the other fifty-one weeks out of the year.

And, most of all, I want to make this list into a reality.

I have some thinking to do and some decisions to make.

I am in the process of redoing my resume/CV! It is harder than I anticipated, partly because trying to format on Word these days is an exercise in misery and partly because I am completely unimpressive. I'm not surprised I couldn't get a new job this summer. My job experience was essentially going from food service in a way that's only viable at that one business due to its unusual processes to a very narrow field of photo printing that barely exists anymore and staying there for four years.

(Want to hire me? I can switch a chemical filter and change a photopaper roll in a pitch black room in under 30 seconds! :D I'll revolutionise your company!)

Yeah, anyway, I've also been volunteering at a ED support and resource centre this summer so I can gain some experience in a reception position or managing a desk/office. I'm enjoying it for the most part; I'm also in a very weird place of not being able to tell whether I'm doing well or not. I need every reference I can get, for obvious reasons, but I tend to finish things long before my supervisor expects me to finish things. I know, this should seem like I'm being unequivocally awesome and I should brag or whatever, but mostly I fear it'll lead to things like "over-qualified" and "will get bored", which can doom a person as much as anything.

So there's that. What I wanted to say was, I need resume help! Lots and lots of it. Tell me about your resumes, people. Part of my duties at the ED centre includes verifying references, so I've seen resumes that not only put mine to shame, but contest my belief that a resume going over one page is a bad thing. Thoughts? Feel free to add expertise in making a history of retail work sound viable to a non-retail employer. Or -- anything, really.

I think this, ladies and gentlemen, is what they call a quarter life crisis.

I'm at that age where friends, people I went to high school with, are getting married and having kids and starting careers. I feel stupidly behind, still slogging through school; and as much as I know that's ridiculous, my path is no less valid than anyone else's, it's still not awesome to feel like my life doesn't meet some imposed standard. My Facebook page is a mess of engagement announcements, ultra sounds, pictures of people with their kids -- and I'm most proud that I was finally able to get past the Citadel in ME1 without throwing my controller in map-inspired rage.

Had a death in my immediate family which I've not wanted to talk about in great detail but I will say, now that I can say it and not feel horribly selfish about it, that anything having to do with my family is exhausting. It was a long bad long week, but it's over now.

Other than that, I've been playing lots of Harvest Moon and exploring volunteer opportunities because I couldn't get my old job back. I might be cleaning cat cages! :D

I also want to get started reading again. I fell out of the habit when I started school which sucks, because reading is awesome and it's like weight lifting for the brain, and I want my brain to be a champion brain wrestler!



Yes, exactly like that.

Recommend me some books, please.