# 26

[temples]

I need to learn that even if things get marginally out of my control, it's not the end of the world. Sometimes situations really are perfectly innocent. Murphy's Law is not always in play. So breathe, self. Breathe.

I'm also discovering I'm a lot happier when I ignore Plurk's existence. So, yay?



Anyway.

I have about thirty tags in my inbox I should be doing! But I spent a good part of the day cleaning and forcing my knee up and down flights of stairs.

Clearly that means it's time for video games.

Liveplay! Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII.

Comments

Where I last left off!

[temples]

A lot of Genesis copies and malfunctioning Shinra equipment attacked the Shinra building. Zack rescued some oversexed middle management and even a materia fusion manlady.

Then Sephiroth is all, "We are going to Mako Reactor 5 to NOT kill Angeal and Genesis, lol."

So I guess Zack went there at some point.


I love the random icon button.

[sincere]

I'm telling you, man. Plurk. My nemesis.

/sits

/despite being at work

[temples]

"IS THAT ANGEAL'S FACE?"

I don't know, Zack.

IS IT?

[temples]

Sephiroth tells-- OH SHIT NO

TAKE YOUR INFINITE MYSTERY

AND YOUR GODDESS

AND GO SOMEWHERE ELSE

[temples]

Sephiroth tells Zack about Angeal, Genesis and him sneaking into the training room and running unauthorised simulations.

~FMV flashback time~!

[temples]

The world needs a new hero, after all.

[temples]

Why does this scene exist.

Aside from being really pretty and demonstrating what a pretentious, badass wannabe villain sue Genesis is.

[temples]

And the minute Genesis gets a papercut, Angeal is all, "NOOOOOOOO."

[temples]

I kind of hate it right now.

/shares popcorn?

[sincere]

what a pretentious, badass wannabe villain sue Genesis is

/sums up this character for me

[temples]

Scene over. It was like Advent Children: The Continuation. Pretty? Yes. Point? Got me.

And then Angeal gave Sephiroth a lecture... even though Genesis was the one being reckless and overly demonstrative in a training simulation...

[temples]

It's totally true. Genesis, why do you exist

[temples]

To be honest, I wasn't really listening.

Which is unfortunate. This game is endearing Sephiroth to me a little. I was never a great fan in the original for the one time I played it, so. Hm.

[temples]

Game, I'd like to hit the monster now.

With my sword.

No, I want to hit it with my sword--

WHAT DO YOU MEAN, I CAN'T.

[temples]

Zack, you're a SOLDIER right.

You can jump and hit a flying bird thing that's two feet above your head, right.

[temples]

Sephiroth, how did you get to the door?

Weren't you behind me?



You didn't move. You just stayed leaning against the wall, behind me.

[temples]

So I died.

And I'm watching the training simulation scene again.

And.

Genesis.

Why do people like you.

[sincere]

Sephiroth was kind of cute in this game and I regretted the inevitable. ;;

Yeah, the cutscene was gorgeous and awesome except for the parts where Genesis was doing things and being a poser. But everything sucks when Genesis is doing things and being a poser.

And quoting motherfucking LOVELESS.

Quotes from LOVELESS are at least 80% of Genesis' dialogue, motivation, and personality.

[temples]

I'm not talking fans, either.

Why does this guy have canon, in-game friends. I don't get it.

[sincere]

Ughhhh why is he such a diiiiick.

[sincere]

...Excellent question.

[temples]

TREASURE PRINCESS has sent you an e-mail

MOVED TO SPAM FOLDER


... tee hee.

[temples]

"Report on the SOLDIER Degradation Phenomenon."

This phenomenon is unique to the SOLDIER Type G.



G! Whatever could that mean!

[temples]

Oh no, Genesis wasn't healing from his papercut!

[temples]

HE NEEDS A TRANSFUSION!


Sephiroth is sad that he can't be the donor. :(

I'm sad too. :(

[temples]

Too much information hurts Zack's brain.




Tiiiiime for an EXAGGERATED BODY FLOP. :D

[temples]

Is Genesis wearing lipstick?

Or are his lips naturally blood red?

[temples]

GENESIS.




USE WORDS.

[temples]

Actually, I take that back.

Genesis.

Shut up.

[temples]

Okay, so.

Sephiroth stood up against a monster incubation unit or something while Zack briefed himself on the basics of Project G.

Then Hollander swung in and told us that only he can reverse the degradation process.

Then Genesis - with one black wing, like you do - dropped in and was all, "GET AWAY FROM MY BOYFRIEND," re: Hollander.

Why?

Because! :D

[temples]

And then Sephiroth agreed to -- do something to Genesis, idk. They could be having a pretentious poetry reading for all I know.

I have to chase after Hollander to find out where Angeal is.

[temples]

I try to go down a corridor.

Zack stops and turns toward an open door and an adjacent room. "I think he went that way!"

Hollander's panting behind a door.

He sees Zack and runs out.

ZACK CAN'T KEEP UP WITH HIM.

[temples]

Zack: SOLDIER 1st Class.

Hollander: Middle-aged, out of shape scientist.

Just think about that for a second.

[temples]

"Hollander! There's no escape!"

You could have tackled him, Zack.

At any point you wanted to.

You could have even grabbed his arm or ran in front of him and blocked his path.

I guess you haven't figured it out since Kunsel never explained the "chasing down fleeing scientists" part of SOLDIER.

[temples]

Zack: What is it you're after?

Angeal: World domination.


I laughed.

[temples]

Angeal showed up and let Hollander run off because-- yeah.

He revealed his wing! He says it's the wing of a monster, but Zack doesn't think so. It's the wing of an angel, he says! But since angels only dream of one thing, Angeal's only option is to pick Zack up and hurl him from great heights in an attempt to... keep his humanity?

[temples]

I don't want to play anymore.

[temples]

I reached critical levels of stupid and turned off the PSP.

But apparently Zack's mom was there or something.

[temples]

An "epic" poem is not a substitute for character building, Final Fantasy.

[temples]

But, man. I'm a little disappointed.

Yesterday was genuinely fun. Stupid, yes. But I was able to glean at least enjoyment from the stupidity. So when I stopped yesterday, I was also excited to pick it back up again today.

Now I'm just like, "....... why am I playing this."

[sincere]

You're actually just getting to something that's not stupid, I think! So there's that!

[temples]

That is slightly comforting. >:

[rainfall]

THIS IS THE WING OF A KILLER, BELLA

[temples]

[rainfall]

I'm sorry. It was completely involuntary.

[temples]

I don't believe you.

[rainfall]

No really. I had no intention to comment on the post and then I saw that and somehow my fingers were moving and then a horrible comment had been made. :( :( :(